Today’s not my day… I am just feeling bad, not enough… My office is a mess, laundry needs to be done. my garage is a danger zone, clients need to be called, my website needs updating, little man A. had a bad day at school, I am feeling like a bad mom … Really I could go on. My list of upsets are not nearly complete. The life coach in me knows better but I am still suffering over it. For crying out loud I am a master trainer for Tony Robbins and I know I should just let it all go, but I am in pretty deep today. Writing this post is hard because I really do not want anyone to know that I do not have it all together.
Who am I kidding? I am not really hiding anything. I am sure my neighbors and friends could tell you all of my faults. I am sitting here in my office again past 11:00 pm wondering How do I have it all? How do I do all that I want to do, do it well and be the kind of mom I am committed to being? I am not sure why I am even writing this post other than I sat down to blog and this is what is coming out. OK. Maybe writting it and reading it back to myself is making me feel better.
What do you do when you do not feel enough? What do you do when you are feeling inadequate? I will tell you something the first thing I do is cry. And I have been doing that on and off all afternoon. Next, I write about it or journal (hence this post) and then I get around to doing something to feel better. Here are my goto strategies, a bath (yes I am one of those women that likes to soak) call a friend, take a walk, read a book, zone out in front of the TV and then I finally just get over it! I know I need to wake up in the morning do my morning ritual and all will be well. I will probably look at my blog in the morning and say “what was I thinking?!”
This post is to all the women out there that are afraid they are not doing the right thing, feel overwhelmed at times and just not enough. I hear you. You are a beautiful, extraordinary women who doesn’t need to do anything other than just be you. I promise to go to bed focusing on that!
Thanks for listening today… I promise I will be better tomorrow!
Please leave a comment on the blog today, What do you do if you ever feel not enough? What do you do to feel better? What do you say to yourself or focus on that makes it all go away?
P.S. A nice glass of red wine and giggles with girlfriends would make me feel better. I wonder if my neighbor is still up. She is always up for a glass…
Tags: girlfriends
I think we all feel like we’re not enough at times. What always surprises me when people talk about it is how even the most seemingly put together people still struggle with not feeling enough. It seems like part of the human condition. So when I don’t think I’m enough, I remind myself that everyone feels that way at some time or on some level and I remind myself to get over it. Often I read. Sometimes I make lists so I feel some measure of illusory control over all I have to do. Sometimes I do a free write where I set the timer and just keep my pen moving until the timer dings. Petting my dog and/or cat helps. Funnily enough, I rarely cry. I cry easily at newspaper articles, other people’s stories, all kinds of things, but I rarely cry about myself. I read my success journal, kudos file, list of acknowledgements, anything to remind me that I am way more than enough. I listen to CDs from the Hoffman Process. I bounce on the rebounder and say my incantations.
And, Jayne, anyone who knows you knows you are way more than enough!!!
Thank you Cindy! You are so thoughtful to check in, leave your comments and you have always had kind words for me.
I feel this way all the time – and I think one of the (only?) good parts about it is my compassion goes up for everyone around me. There’s a great quote that goes something like “be kinder to people than is necessary … you never know what they’re going through.” I think if we all gave each other some slack for just being human, the world would be a better place.
I felt that way ALL weekend. I feel like your sharing that you feel that way too somehow validates it as being ok! So I thank you for your candor. I like to either go for a walk or just goof off in the yard with my dogs. They are usually the ones who I feel the least judged with, or the ones I can fail the least! On the worst of days I make a smores in the microwave and call it a day!
Kate I love the idea of smores! I am a big Hot Cocoa girl too! Thanks for your comments.
Darlin’, I’m still wearing what I wore to bed – with the addition of a 19 year old sweatshirt that I got freshman year of college. Gorgeous! AND I had to get out of the car at pick-up today! It happens. I’m sorry yesterday stunk, and I’m sorry I didn’t read about it until today because I would have shown up with a bottle and 2 glasses – and 2 kids too, but what can you do?
Now we know I don’t zone out in front of the TV – or more to the point, can’t! So I go pull weeds. I don’t know if its being outside or the rhythm of it, but I find it relaxing. Apparently, by the look of my yard, I haven’t been too stressed out this summer so I should take today for what it is – a day off.
Don’t be too hard on yourself – you rock. my celebrity friend! I hope today is better.
YO-GA! YO-GA! YO-GA!
Mary!
You are so great! Thanks for the post. Yes! When are we going to do Yoga?
can we get out for a drink this weekend? Just a glass of wine? How about Kaizen?
xo
Jayne
We are never enough…we are women. We have unrealistic expectations of ourselves and we need to remember how amazing we truly are. We can’t look at what we didn’t do right…Always look at what we did do right. That always makes me feel better. Look at the sleeping faces of your beautiful & healthy children. It will make your heart “happy” (as my 3 year old would say). A good bath and wine always helps too. (and if mary shows up with wine you better come get me
)
Now off to my part time night job so I can put my degree to some use…see never enough
Cindy. You are such a slacker! Go get that part time job and do something with your life! LOL Thanks for being my friend. If you can tear yourself away from that baby lets get out!
xo
J
Jaynie, my love, Your website, your beautiful photographer’s eye, and your authentic sweetness are stunning! You are a light in this world. Thank you for being you!… and, I’m on my way over for a glass of wine and especially the giggles! Gorgeous is the perfect word for you!
Love and blessings, to you -always, Mimi
Mimi, You are so amazing. Thanks for checking in and posting. I completely adore you!
xo Jayne
Jayne,
I love that you posted such honest and personal thoughts – I wish I were that brave!… Thank you for letting us see that you are human too – because, Jayne, you know that you are my SUPERWOMAN role model!!! You are a phenomenal woman, mother, friend, coach, photographer and the list goes on and on. You are so inspiring – and now even more so, because you expressed such raw humanity.
I’m sorry you had a crummy day – but if I know you, I’m sure that feeling was fleeting and you’re back to “kicking it in it’s — ”
Love you
Christa xoxo
Oh Jayne…you are amazing! Very brave for posting this, and I thank you! You are someone I admire and its good to know you have bad days too ;). I feel this way from time to time and my go to strategies are ~ snuggles with my baby girl, zoning out in front of the TV ;), and my hubs is always good for a reality check! :). As women today we all take on way too much and expect ourselves to be the best at it all….thats crazy! Just do the best you can do and do whatever it takes to make yourself happy. On a day to day basis ask yourself – is this making me happy? If not…go do something else for a minute! Life is too short ladies…
Thanks for the reminder – haven’t written (nor read) in my success journal for weeks. It always brings me back up!
Jayne, I know how you feel. As women we set our expectations of ourselves WAY to high. What we really need to do is just stop and see the woman that our children see when they look at us, because really…that is how great we are. We just forget that. Anytime you need to sip on red wine I am a car ride away! xoxo
jayne…glass? didn’t you mean bottle?
The # 1 thing that works for me is being in Mitch’s arms. He truly sucks the depression right out of me! We need to chat about your photo parties. Email me please!
Andi, I love that!